If I Were to Do Power Rankings for Week 13…

Jul 4

“There are no extraordinary men... just extraordinary circumstances that ordinary men are forced to deal with.”

-Admiral William “Bull” Halsey

In the past, I and just about everyone in the universe, compare losing teams to the Titanic. A sinking ship that is doomed, but has many people still on it. I’m going to propose a second ship to compare what happened last week. Allow me to introduce you all to my favorite World War II story: The USS Yorktown (CV-5, not to be confused with the Yorktown CV-10 which was an Essex class named in honor of the CV-5).

During the War in the Pacific, the Yorktown was one of three Yorktown class aircraft carriers. It participated in several battles, but most notably was in the Battle of Coral Sea where it was severely damaged. It was taken to Pearl Harbor for repairs, but during its time, the information that the Imperial Japanese Navy would attack Midway came out. So with engineers and welders still on board fixing the ship, it set sail to join the battle. During that battle, it takes several bombs and looks like it’s going to share the fate of three of the Japanese Navy’s carriers. Only it didn’t sink. All those workers from Pearl Harbor plus the Yorktown’s normal company of engineers had the fires put out, operations back on, and the ship back up to speed.

Which made it the perfect target for another bomb attack as the Japanese airmen thought they were hitting a completely different carrier. The Yorktown was then abandoned… but it still didn’t sink. The US began to tow it back to Pearl Harbor with plans to fix it up again. But a Japanese sub slipped through the destroyer line and hit it with several torpedoes. At this point, the Yorktown was deemed unsalvageable and… it still didn’t sink. It remained afloat for 9 hours before finally capsizing and then sank. This was a ship that just refused to die until it finally was inevitable.

What happened this week was several Yorktown teams refused to sink. In particular, Jon’s, Ian’s, and Andrew’s teams. They’re sinking, people have noted the holes in them and how they’re unlikely to keep going. But somehow, they’re still fighting and just won’t go down. They’re even a little distracting to other teams as they go. It’d be inspirational if it wasn’t so tragic.

Now don’t cry for the Yorktown. Its wreck was discovered by Robert Ballard in 1998, both upright and in surprisingly good condition. And speaking of wrecks, let’s see how week 13 went for everyone else and where we all stack up:

Current Standings

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Mike
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Dan
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James
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Mark
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Vinson 
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Andrew
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Jon (+1)
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Richard (-1)
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Joey
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Patrick
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Ian (+1)
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Brooke (-1)
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Week 12 Standings

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Mike
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Dan
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James
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Mark
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Vinson
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Andrew
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Richard
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Jon
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Joey
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Patrick
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Brooke
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Ian
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The Week 13 roto points that would have had you win if we were a rotisserie league.

Week 13 Power Rankings

1. Mike

There was a moment when it looked like Vinson was going to pull off something big here. The pitching categories of ERA, WHIP, and K/BB were that close. But again, pitching is Mike’s strong suit. Well, that and Cal Raleigh hitting 4 home runs every week, although he was quieter this week with only 1. Thankfully Seager and Lowe made up for that difference. Writing up Mike’s weekly beats is getting difficult because every week I have to find some new accolade of his to talk about or some minor blemish that if it was bigger would have mattered more. It’s like trying to make Mike Tyson sound like he was in trouble in order to fill the pay per view of a five minute fight. Mike is good, it’s hard to beat him, it’s because of his strong pitching and also his hitting is annoyingly good too.

2. Dan

What a perfect time to face Pat. Dan’s victory now puts him within arm’s reach of Mike. There was a brief moment it looked Perdomo was cooling down, but he looks back now. Not as good as Ketel Marte though, as his 4 home runs this week were almost a third of Dan’s this week. Speaking of cooling down, Zac Gallen has been ice cold and was finally too much for Dan as he dropped him. Other than that, Dan had a decent week of streaming… if you ignore that Ober pick up. Dan’s had some really good weeks while others have had really bad ones which is how he finds himself face first in Mike’s butt. The glaring flaw is still this pitching staff as the only reason it did well was because Pat’s pitching staff is even worse. What Dan has going for him is a very long history of streaming that he’s usually pretty good at it. But he needs to find a real anchor to this staff now that Gallen isn’t here, both literally now but figuratively before.

3. Vinson

I know I’m supposed to hate Vinson. Because he’s won a lot recently and he gets away with trades that you wouldn’t think possible, but like… he’s never been more attractive to me after he dropped Michael Harris II. Maybe Harris turns it around in August like he does, but boy he’s not worth sticking with this horrible performance. And it’s nice to see more people getting wise to it and not holding onto some Ghost from Christmas Past ballplayer. I’ve talked too much about Michael Harris now, especially since it was on Monday when he was dropped.

4. Mark

Ok it’s time for me to eat some crow. In the offseason I said that Josh Naylor would be bad this year because he was leaving the wind tunnel of Progressive Field. He has been absolutely fine and has had a fantastic average to go with it. Maybe we value park factors too much… Also I’m shocked with Jo Adell’s progress. I love the guy, but he’s always regressed back from this. Or he tricks me to believing again which is exactly what he’s doing because he has like a 26% strikeout rate this time and that’s like 14% less than his usual and he’s hitting more balls in the zone and oh my god guys, Jo Adell has arrived! On the pitching side, pour one out for Shane Smith. I really liked this guy but wow. When he regressed, he really regressed. Also, I’m sorry but who streams Brayan Bello against Toronto? Fortunately, the rest of Mark’s pitching is solid that he was able to secure K/BB of all things. Mark’s team has taken some hits lately, so I’m curious if things even out or that he makes another move.

5. Andrew

This team is the originator of the Yorktown image. I don’t know what to do with Heller’s team because some days he seems like he’s got the team that can overpower Mike’s. Other weeks it seems like he’s at the bottom of the ocean. I can’t figure out if he’s going to sink or make it back to Pearl Harbor again. This week, it seems like he’s fully operational, battle ready Yorktown. Now ok, okay. He went against Brooke whose team, while better, isn’t the strongest team in the league. But Heller still finished top of the league in roto points this week. His team fired on all cylinders, the only real blemish was his ERA was high. But who cares, he wiped the floor with Brooke and would have wiped the floor with most of us. I think it’s safe to say Bryan Reynolds is finally back. Yandy Diaz was a brilliant pick up and that’s coming from someone who has never been a Yandy man. Pitching wise, Heller’s staff complimented each other really well. Even if ERA blew up, the pitcher provided help in WHIP or K/BB. This is fantastic and it’s what made me believe his team would sneak into the playoffs. And yet next week his team might bat .190 and have no counting stats. So, I just don’t know if he’ll survive this season.

6. James

Blergh. This was bad. This was everything going bad all at once. Except Juan Soto, who hilariously started to hit consistently. Jac Caglianone going 1 for 21 didn’t help things. And James knows this as he’s already trying to shop his top rookies around to bolster this team. I do believe he shouldn’t feel too pressured to make a big move as this is probably a speed bump on his resurgence year. But this kind of week does exist if Wilson and Edwards don’t provide that average bump like they usually do. Pitching was mixed for you. Misiorowski, Wheeler, and Enns were fine, but their work was undone by Blackburn, Cameron, and McGreevy. I almost want to say James shouldn’t have streamed this week, but he’d have lost stats either way so there’s not much that could have been done differently here. Ultimately, I think this shouldn’t be panicked over too much. This is still the same team that took James to second overall. If a major injury comes out because of this week, then start to panic a little bit.

7. Jon

Well hello, there. Yes, I still have you at rank 7. It’s not my fault that the teams above you also had good weeks. Take solace in your contribution to knock James out of the top 4 for the week. I’m honestly stunned you dismantled James this well. And not just by a little either. There are obviously still concerns with this team’s consistency (just paste what I’ve written about them week to week). Jazz, Kurtz, Cam Smith, Josh Lowe, and Cowser were easily the highlights of the week. But what makes me worried are the guys that we expected to be the ones to be praised here. Langford has been disappointing and is now injured, Robert has been really disappointing and is now injured, McLain has just been disappointing, and Rice… wait Rice is on this team? I find this team weird which is why it’s one of the Yorktowns. This team sold! It was prepared to sink beneath the waves! How is it still floating and sinking other ships?

8. Brooke

Well she had a good run. Actually this was kind of a heroic effort against Heller. It’s just that Heller has these weeks where it doesn’t matter what your team does, he just blows them away. It sucks because Brooke obviously would have beaten a good number of other teams had she been the one facing them. The only real blemish was that disastrous outing from Huascar Brazoban (That cannot be his name. Isn’t that the name of the President of the Galaxy from Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy?). Losing Jeremy Pena to the IL sucks because he was having a career year and was seriously anchoring Brooke’s team alongside Ohtani. Brooke needs to make some move for more pitching, be it a very lucky free agent pick up or a savvy trade. Because right now I don’t know what her plans are and I’m not super confident in both her selection of keepers for next year nor her chances to actually make the playoffs. On the positive side though: Ohtani is still awesome and he’s started to pitch again. So that makes this team automatically more exciting.

9. Ian

Okay look… It’s not like I like you, baka. And like… you didn’t do that good okay? It’s just like… you really just… I mean wow man. Good job. Of all the teams that were sunk, I figured you were on the bottom of the ocean, three miles down. Everyone you picked up has yet to really make an impact. And to be fair, there wasn’t one specific guy that did great this week. Julio and Winn hit for average and gave you a home run each. But the rest of your team was so mediocre, it’s like they knew they could take it easy this week. Having me take Sandy from you was like mana from the sky as you avoided that 10.50 ERA and 1.667 WHIP. And yeah, I guess we can all finally accept that Strider is back. Thicc thighs do save lives. And also boats.

10. Richard

Just drown me already. This week was bad. Goodman, Burger, and Suarez all got hurt (although Burger was the only one to go on the IL) and the rest of my team decided to turn into pumpkins (except Elly who has been quietly having a career year). Nothing went right this week. My power and hitting were gone, my pitching blew up no matter who it was, and my Midwestern Relievers barely got used. At a certain point I just started to look for things to prep for next week. This was the last straw with Jung Hoo Lee, I don’t care what his upside is, his current ability is killing me when I drafted him specifically for average and speed. Tommy Edman is next on that cutting board if he doesn’t start doing something. This is just a blip, right? Right?

11. Joey

Sigh. What are we doing, Joey? Are we winning, son? What’s the plan here? Oh wait, this was against Mark? Jeez, okay well done. But those counting stats are needing some serious help, especially the RBIs and Ks. I’m glad to see Nootbaar showed a pulse this week even if it was with a .200 average because of just 3 hits total. I’m still out on the guy, but I don’t know, maybe he does something? JJ Bleday needs to be yeeted into the sun and not looked back on. The outfield in general needs a lot of love. PCA can’t be the only guy here, especially when his strikeout rate is finally catching up to him. And this pitching squad is SHALLOW. You need to start streaming and stop letting Dan and Jon take all the good ones each week. Be the spoiler that I believe you can be. Also you won’t be able to keep Witt and Harper this year so start thinking who gets traded at the deadline for a big fat paycheck.

12. Pat

I’m going to let you in on a secret. For the past few weeks, I had a HTML code sitting up at rank 11 that allowed me to make a smaller font in Squarespace. I would just keep editing it over and over in case I needed it for one of Pat’s weeks again. Only for Pat to finally push me to putting his team last in the power rankings. So, it’s the end of an era. Or really just the end of June and my HTML code. Pat’s offense continues to flounder although this week did provide good news in the return of Chandler Simpson and that apparently Alex Bregman is healthy for the All Star Game. That doesn’t help Pat win against the budding performance of Dan, but it does let him have a bit of hope that better days are to come. Pitching wise, it’s still Nathan Eovaldi and Kris Bubic as Pat tries desperately to find a pitcher who is both good and has a fully functional elbow devoid of any loose bodies. I guess the one positive I can say is that I don’t see Pat being last in these power rankings forever. I just think it’s going to continue to be a rough time for a little while longer.

Performances of the week:

Hitter:

Juan Soto: 7/23, 7 Runs, 4 HR, 6 RBI, 1 SB, .304 AVG, 1.233 OPS

Pitcher:

Tarik Skubal: 13 IP, 21 Ks, 2.77 ERA, 0.692 WHIP, 10.50 K/BB

Clutch performances of the Week: